Problems become much less painful and complicated when you finally figure out that they aren't important; when you decide that you can do better than that guy who treats you like dirt, or simply doesn't return your feelings; when you realize that your life is full of friends who care enough about you to listen to you complain, to offer you advice when you need and want it, and to give you ego that extra little boost it needs when you're feelin' down; and most of all, when you can rely on God, whose love is always there, no matter what, even though you don't deserve it.
Thank you, problems. You make me appreciate the seemingly problemless times so much more.
Thank you, men. Your existence makes life...interesting
Thank you, my friends. You are all so wonderful. You let me whine at you, and you offered me advice, and you gave me lots of support and comfort when I needed it. You guys rock my socks.
Thank you, God. You love me, even though I don't' come close to deserving it. You rock my world.
'Cause he showed me His love
by sending me you
And it's ok now
Everything's ok
Monday, October 24, 2005
Friday, October 14, 2005
My Life as the Emotional Equivalent of Kingda Ka
When I last posted here, my life was going fantastically. Of course, precisely a week later, things were not going so well, and life has had some virulently dramatic ups and downs since then. My classes are still totally fun (minus my TA period), play practice still tends to be the highlight of my day, and when we taped our episode of High-Five on the 5th, which was a total blast. The thing is, despite all of this really great stuff that's been going on in my life, one issue has dragging me down. A part of me feels like I have a big decision to make, like I need to take action and then live with the consequences. The other part of me feels like I'm stuck with no options whatsoever, like I can move neither forward or backward, and I'm just waiting for something to happen, because no matter what I do, it will yield the same result as ever.
What I am referring to is my current situation _____________________*. ______frustrate me to no end. I feel like there always has and always will be _______________________________well...__________. It's like every time __________, there's something _______________________ happening.
In __________ it was ______. I ________, __________ me, then ______________________________. ___ broke________. It's hard ___________________________________ a person.
It wasn't until __________________I got really ____________ again. ________ seemed perfect _______ in every way, and _____________ a very long time, __________________________________. _________. It's hard _____________________________________________.
That same year ______________, ______________________, and I wasn't ____________________. It's hard to have ___________________________.
At the end __________, _____________________. I couldn't stop ____________, and I had _______________. In reality, ______________ good ___________, and if it weren't for the fact ________________, _______________________. Things as they are, _________________________irreconcilable _________________________. ________________________________ doesn't help either. ___________________________________________________opposite directions.
In _____________, _______________ directed elsewhere, and, to be honest, ___________________. ___ intensely _____________, ______________...but _________________. It seems that ___________________. ______________, it's because _______________________________________. This makes ________________________________, ___ completely unattainable. Part of me wants to just ____________________________________, I'd be ____________________, ____________ I think ____________________________________________________, ___ using ________________________________________________ other. _____ the other part of me ____________, ___________________________________________________so much ____________________________________________________, __ nary _________, nor ________. It's hard ________________________________ cares more about __________ the possibility ________.
While the memories of __________________ still _________, _____ and ____ are ______________________ crazy. ______________ throughout ______________, even though _____________________________________________, and _________________________ everyone, I can't really tell ________________. _______________________________________________ dismayed ____________ positively ill, _____________________________________________________. I've barely ______________, _______I think _______________. ___________ should ____________, but I don't want to _______________. As far as _________________, it's been __________________ "__, ______________________!" _________________________, _____________________similar _____________________________, __________ unsure of ___________. Of course, the fact that ____________________________ "_______" ________________ doesn't help _____________.
So right now, _____(______________) ___________________ life an emotional roller coaster. Sometimes I'm on top of the world, and other times I feel like ________________________. Hopefully things will all work out soon. If I got my way, this problem would end with ____________________________________________________, I know that God's way is always better, and if he wants me to come out of this with ___________________, or some other ___, or ________________ at all, I know that he'll take care of me and make everything work out all right.
*This post has been edited from its original version. It has been formatted to...not be incriminating.
Anyway the thing is well I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen
What I am referring to is my current situation _____________________*. ______frustrate me to no end. I feel like there always has and always will be _______________________________well...__________. It's like every time __________, there's something _______________________ happening.
In __________ it was ______. I ________, __________ me, then ______________________________. ___ broke________. It's hard ___________________________________ a person.
It wasn't until __________________I got really ____________ again. ________ seemed perfect _______ in every way, and _____________ a very long time, __________________________________. _________. It's hard _____________________________________________.
That same year ______________, ______________________, and I wasn't ____________________. It's hard to have ___________________________.
At the end __________, _____________________. I couldn't stop ____________, and I had _______________. In reality, ______________ good ___________, and if it weren't for the fact ________________, _______________________. Things as they are, _________________________irreconcilable _________________________. ________________________________ doesn't help either. ___________________________________________________opposite directions.
In _____________, _______________ directed elsewhere, and, to be honest, ___________________. ___ intensely _____________, ______________...but _________________. It seems that ___________________. ______________, it's because _______________________________________. This makes ________________________________, ___ completely unattainable. Part of me wants to just ____________________________________, I'd be ____________________, ____________ I think ____________________________________________________, ___ using ________________________________________________ other. _____ the other part of me ____________, ___________________________________________________so much ____________________________________________________, __ nary _________, nor ________. It's hard ________________________________ cares more about __________ the possibility ________.
While the memories of __________________ still _________, _____ and ____ are ______________________ crazy. ______________ throughout ______________, even though _____________________________________________, and _________________________ everyone, I can't really tell ________________. _______________________________________________ dismayed ____________ positively ill, _____________________________________________________. I've barely ______________, _______I think _______________. ___________ should ____________, but I don't want to _______________. As far as _________________, it's been __________________ "__, ______________________!" _________________________, _____________________similar _____________________________, __________ unsure of ___________. Of course, the fact that ____________________________ "_______" ________________ doesn't help _____________.
So right now, _____(______________) ___________________ life an emotional roller coaster. Sometimes I'm on top of the world, and other times I feel like ________________________. Hopefully things will all work out soon. If I got my way, this problem would end with ____________________________________________________, I know that God's way is always better, and if he wants me to come out of this with ___________________, or some other ___, or ________________ at all, I know that he'll take care of me and make everything work out all right.
*This post has been edited from its original version. It has been formatted to...not be incriminating.
Anyway the thing is well I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
I Lose
A month ago I was totally dreading the start of what I knew would be the worst school year since my middle school days. So far, this has been one of the best.
I was afraid Expressions was going to be filled with the horrible drama that was witnessed at the end of last year. So far, I've been thoroughly enjoying it. Everyone (for the most part) has been nice and I think we have a great sound this year.
I knew that Post-Secondary Planning would be awful, because everyone said that Mr. English was horrible and the class was boring. Mr. English is strict and a little weird sometimes, but, for the most part he's really very nice and helpful. Plus, all the kids in that class are really nice and fun to chat with as we all work on our own stuff.
I don't know anyone in my English 12 class, but most of the kids are pretty quiet, and those who talk seem pretty okay. Mrs. Shown is great, so even though the class is pretty easy for me, I still enjoy it.
Pro Cantorum is fun-tastic because Mrs. Bohart switched me to second soprano in that choir (I'm still an alto in Expressions) and the girls I get to sit next to are really fun. Add to that the fact that I get to sing up high, and that class is rockin'-awesome!
I was excited about Americana before school started. i knew it would be a good class, I just didn't know how good. All the people in the class are totally different and interesting and Mr. Sweeting is a wonderfully fun teacher. We get to talk about neat stuff and we have really good discussions in that class. Ah, so awesome.
I think my only disappointing class is my choir TA, mostly for two reasons: first, Mrs. Bohart isn't at school in the afternoons because she goes home to be with her kids; second, since I"m TAing during Mens Apprentice Choir (which is an all-guy choir mostly composed of Freshman) I get hit on my creepy underclassmen who all seem to think that acting like they're "hustlers" and "playas" will magically cause me to be interested in them. *gag*
Of course, my IPs are all pretty sweet. I pretty much spend all of that lovely free-time hanging out in the library goofing off and rolling quarters down my nose (don't ask). Sah-weet.
And play practice. Ah, sweet play practice. It's so much fun! All the other cast members and crew people have been totally nice, and (so far) Ms. Martin-Cohn has be strict, but amiable. Practice is hard work, and sometimes it's discouraging to have all the people around you who have experience with drama seem to know what's going on while you're completely lost, but Ms. Martin-Cohn and the other actors are really great about keeping me up to speed without making me feel like an idiot, so it's all good. Honestly, practice is pretty much one of (if not the) biggest highlights in my day.
Oh, I almost forgot! The High-Five/play practice conflict worked out fine. Ms. Martin-Cohn said it'd be fine if I missed some practices (it helps that there's another Marian to take my place when needed) for High-Five, so I get to do both! Joy...
My very favorite person, Jenell, is on Homecoming court! I'm so excited for her I can barely contain myself! I'm just so proud of her...yay!
Suffice it to say, I was pretty much all wrong about the whole "my Senior year is going to be horrible" thing. I lose.
I was afraid Expressions was going to be filled with the horrible drama that was witnessed at the end of last year. So far, I've been thoroughly enjoying it. Everyone (for the most part) has been nice and I think we have a great sound this year.
I knew that Post-Secondary Planning would be awful, because everyone said that Mr. English was horrible and the class was boring. Mr. English is strict and a little weird sometimes, but, for the most part he's really very nice and helpful. Plus, all the kids in that class are really nice and fun to chat with as we all work on our own stuff.
I don't know anyone in my English 12 class, but most of the kids are pretty quiet, and those who talk seem pretty okay. Mrs. Shown is great, so even though the class is pretty easy for me, I still enjoy it.
Pro Cantorum is fun-tastic because Mrs. Bohart switched me to second soprano in that choir (I'm still an alto in Expressions) and the girls I get to sit next to are really fun. Add to that the fact that I get to sing up high, and that class is rockin'-awesome!
I was excited about Americana before school started. i knew it would be a good class, I just didn't know how good. All the people in the class are totally different and interesting and Mr. Sweeting is a wonderfully fun teacher. We get to talk about neat stuff and we have really good discussions in that class. Ah, so awesome.
I think my only disappointing class is my choir TA, mostly for two reasons: first, Mrs. Bohart isn't at school in the afternoons because she goes home to be with her kids; second, since I"m TAing during Mens Apprentice Choir (which is an all-guy choir mostly composed of Freshman) I get hit on my creepy underclassmen who all seem to think that acting like they're "hustlers" and "playas" will magically cause me to be interested in them. *gag*
Of course, my IPs are all pretty sweet. I pretty much spend all of that lovely free-time hanging out in the library goofing off and rolling quarters down my nose (don't ask). Sah-weet.
And play practice. Ah, sweet play practice. It's so much fun! All the other cast members and crew people have been totally nice, and (so far) Ms. Martin-Cohn has be strict, but amiable. Practice is hard work, and sometimes it's discouraging to have all the people around you who have experience with drama seem to know what's going on while you're completely lost, but Ms. Martin-Cohn and the other actors are really great about keeping me up to speed without making me feel like an idiot, so it's all good. Honestly, practice is pretty much one of (if not the) biggest highlights in my day.
Oh, I almost forgot! The High-Five/play practice conflict worked out fine. Ms. Martin-Cohn said it'd be fine if I missed some practices (it helps that there's another Marian to take my place when needed) for High-Five, so I get to do both! Joy...
My very favorite person, Jenell, is on Homecoming court! I'm so excited for her I can barely contain myself! I'm just so proud of her...yay!
Suffice it to say, I was pretty much all wrong about the whole "my Senior year is going to be horrible" thing. I lose.
Wednesday, September 14, 2005
...
Yeah, just call me Marian Paroo, librarian.
!!!
Yeah, I pretty much screamed and danced around when I found out.
Awesome.
!!!
*dies of happiness*
!!!
Yeah, I pretty much screamed and danced around when I found out.
Awesome.
!!!
*dies of happiness*
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
!?
Okay, so long story short, I got a call-back for Marian in The Music Man. Call-backs are tomorrow...which is soon...
*heart attack*
...yeah...
Fin.
*heart attack*
...yeah...
Fin.
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
To Sing or Not to Sing
That is the question. I'm not talking about whether or not I should sing in general, just whether I should try out for the school musical.
Here's the problem. At the end of last year I tried out for and made it onto the High Five team. At that time, Mr. Beaman told us we'd have a meeting in his classroom on September 12th to talk about when our recording date is, when we'd be practicing, etc. He said that our taping date would come up quickly, maybe a week or two after practice starts. You may be asking yourself, "Self, this doesn't really seem like much of a problem..." Well yeah, except that auditions for The Music Man are on September 12th or 13th (you don't have to go to both), call backs are on the 14th (you have to be there for the entire thing), and rehearsals start the next day going from 3:30 PM to 5:30 PM (I think). Problem.
My parents, my choir director, and my voice teacher all seem to think it'd be really good for me to do the musical. I think it'd be fun, but I've made a previous commitment to do High Five, and I don't want to drop it and let down the team. There is a possibility (due to other teammates potential conflicts) that our team might have to push back High Five practice to after Cross country practice, which I think gets out the same time as play practice, but I don't know. There's also a possibility that we might lose our two best team members if Mr. Reaney won't let them miss practice to do High Five, or Mr. Beaman won't push back practice 'til after XC practice. If we lost them I don't think we'd be able to get two more team members tried out and practiced up quickly enough, and I"m not sure we'd be able to do the show. Hence, I don't know what to do.
So now's where y'all come in. I would really appreciate some good advice or something. Should I just give up on the musical and dedicate myself to High Five 100%? Should I talk to Mr. Beaman and see if I can miss some practices (since I've done High Five twice before and already know how it works) even if I have to take a lesser team position like stealer or something? Should I try to convince the team to ask Beaman to make the practice later? Should I just forget about High Five and throw myself into the musical? All of the above? None of the above? Two or more of the above all mixed together? Something? Leave me a comment and let me know what you think.
It's my senior year! This is my last chance to be in High Five and my last chance to be in a school musical! I just want to do both...
...
Edit:
Oh yeah! I forgot! This is post 150! YAY!
Here's the problem. At the end of last year I tried out for and made it onto the High Five team. At that time, Mr. Beaman told us we'd have a meeting in his classroom on September 12th to talk about when our recording date is, when we'd be practicing, etc. He said that our taping date would come up quickly, maybe a week or two after practice starts. You may be asking yourself, "Self, this doesn't really seem like much of a problem..." Well yeah, except that auditions for The Music Man are on September 12th or 13th (you don't have to go to both), call backs are on the 14th (you have to be there for the entire thing), and rehearsals start the next day going from 3:30 PM to 5:30 PM (I think). Problem.
My parents, my choir director, and my voice teacher all seem to think it'd be really good for me to do the musical. I think it'd be fun, but I've made a previous commitment to do High Five, and I don't want to drop it and let down the team. There is a possibility (due to other teammates potential conflicts) that our team might have to push back High Five practice to after Cross country practice, which I think gets out the same time as play practice, but I don't know. There's also a possibility that we might lose our two best team members if Mr. Reaney won't let them miss practice to do High Five, or Mr. Beaman won't push back practice 'til after XC practice. If we lost them I don't think we'd be able to get two more team members tried out and practiced up quickly enough, and I"m not sure we'd be able to do the show. Hence, I don't know what to do.
So now's where y'all come in. I would really appreciate some good advice or something. Should I just give up on the musical and dedicate myself to High Five 100%? Should I talk to Mr. Beaman and see if I can miss some practices (since I've done High Five twice before and already know how it works) even if I have to take a lesser team position like stealer or something? Should I try to convince the team to ask Beaman to make the practice later? Should I just forget about High Five and throw myself into the musical? All of the above? None of the above? Two or more of the above all mixed together? Something? Leave me a comment and let me know what you think.
It's my senior year! This is my last chance to be in High Five and my last chance to be in a school musical! I just want to do both...
...
Edit:
Oh yeah! I forgot! This is post 150! YAY!
Thursday, September 01, 2005
Academia: The (Hopefully) Final Chapter
Okay, this time it wasn't my fault. The school changed the periods Post Secondary Planning is offered, so here's my new new schedule:
0. Expressions: Bohart
1. Post Secondary Planning: English
2. Pro Cantorum: Bohart
3. English 12: Shown
4. Americana: Sweeting
5. IP
6. IP
7. IP
8. Teacher Assistant: Bohart
So, now my afternoons are basically free. Hehe...
School is coming up very quickly now, which is a bit sad, but I'll get over it.
Enjoy this bit of fun, as well as this and this and this.
0. Expressions: Bohart
1. Post Secondary Planning: English
2. Pro Cantorum: Bohart
3. English 12: Shown
4. Americana: Sweeting
5. IP
6. IP
7. IP
8. Teacher Assistant: Bohart
So, now my afternoons are basically free. Hehe...
School is coming up very quickly now, which is a bit sad, but I'll get over it.
Enjoy this bit of fun, as well as this and this and this.
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