"For one human being to love another; that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation."
- Rainer Maria Rilke
Love is simultaneously the most beautiful and most complicated thing in the world; the most simple and the most complex; the most fulfilling and the most draining; the most soothing and the most painful. Love is first an unknown force attracting you to another human being. They seem beautiful and perfect to you in every way; you never imagined you would find someone who understands and cares for you in this way. Then time goes by, obstacles and complications arise; you are suddenly cognizant of the fact that the person before you is not perfect, and they realize the same of you. This is when the involuntary act of "falling in love" gives way to the reality of which true love is comprised: work.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
"Love never fails."
- I Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV)
This Bible verse about love is often quoted, but I think people view this in a much more passive sense than it was intended. What I mean is, people seem to think that this is what comes naturally or easily if you "really" love someone and if these things don't just happen, maybe you're not really in love. Of course, this is not the case.
Love is action. Love is hard work. Days before his crucifixion, Jesus told his disciples exactly what it means to love someone:
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."
- John 15:13 (NIV)
You see, love is sacrifice. Now, for most people, loving others will not involve literally dying for them, but I imagine that the sort of "dying" we who love and follow Christ must do every day (that is, dying to the self every day) should be applied to everyone we love. To truly love someone, you must make a conscious decision to their needs and desires before your own. Unfortunately, if my own inclinations are any indication, this completely defies the human's natural instincts. It is only through the love and grace Jesus has shown me and through the work he is slowly doing to rid me of the cancerous "self" and replace my old thoughts and desires with his own that I have made what little progress I have toward becoming a truly loving person.
There are many people I would say that I "love," but if I were to be truly honest with myself, I would realize that, most of the time, there are many people I feel affection for and treat well when it suits my purposes or moods. If they happen to catch me on a bad day or if they do something I dislike, my "love" seems to vanish all too quickly. This is something I greatly dislike about myself, and I pray that Jesus will continue the work he has started in me to change this. I want to really love the people I love. This means all of my family and friends, and also one person in particular whom I love very much and in a way I never thought I could who seems to doubt the ability of people our age to truly know what love is and experience it. I'm afraid this person has given up on love. I only pray that their faith in this greatest thing will return if, through my actions, I can show true love which "always hopes, always perseveres." That I can be a model of the fact that "love never fails," no matter how hard it gets or how much it hurts. I pray that I can be a living reflection of the perfect, sacrificial love of Christ.
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